Sparkle Soap

Hi. For those of you who don't know me, this is a blog about things that I think are funny, but for some reason or another for which I never found an outlet. Maybe it was just too much television as a child (Damn you GOBOTS!) but I spend a lot of time thinking about what wrong with the world and how much people waste my time. For example...

I wrote this letter to the CEO of Sparkle soap when I visited Disneyworld the last time I went to Los Angeles. I did a search on the web and there is no Sparkle Soap, but I guarantee you, the signs exist. (I would have taken a picture, but laughing when other men are standing next to you at the urinal is creepy/insulting enough.) If anyone, knows the address to Sparkle Soap, please send me the address and I'll send this along...


Dear CEO of Sparkle Soap,

I visited Disneyland recently, and had to use the restroom. I was surprised to find instructions in English, explaining how to wash my hands. At first, I thought, what person needs instructions on how to wash their hands? But then I thought what type of person does not learn to wash his hands but learns to read? The only explanation I had was the employees of Disneyland. Why else would those instructions be there?

Seeing that signs lets me know what you think of the intelligence of frequenters of Disneyland. I’m really not comfortable buying anything as basic as soap from someone who feels they need to provide instructions in a public restroom. Just so you know, those of us who can read also learned bathroom etiquette, so you don’t need to place signs around bathrooms in Disneyland.

Also, please don’t send me a reply, as I stated before, I don’t know where your hands have been and don’t want to chance it.

Yours,

The Chronic Nice Guy